EXT. SMALL VILLAGE – DAY
We open on a mysterious girl holding a bright red parasol. She is standing in front of a large shrine. We then focus on a crowd of people, walking along a busy street. A crow caws, and a small spirit skitters along the ground, upwards towards the girl.
She turns away from the shrine to pet the creature.
The crow swoops down, landing on the shoulder of an ENIGMATIC FIGURE, who smiles a toothy grin. The mysterious girl turns, quickly, only to see the crowd walking behind her. She is surrounded from all sides by passersby.
FEWNDY, a young teenage boy with brown hair and rustic village clothing appears, waving at the girl.
FEWNDY
Hi!
He runs up to her with a flushed look on his face. He looks around.
FEWNDY
There you are. Why’d you run off to a weird place like this?
LUĆEDA
Jaeja ćutto vù, mahetta Lućeda-ćho ‘neia?
FEWNDY
Oh, of course. That explains it.
He gestures at the mysterious girl, LUĆEDA, to follow him.
FEWNDY
Come on! We need to get home before my mom blows a gasket. Hey, did you manage to pick up the fish? You understand fish, r-right?
Fewndy traces the outline of a fish with his fingers. Lućeda responds by reaching into her clothing to reveal a tiny wrapped package of fish.
FEWNDY
Awesome! Let’s hurry then. People are starving and we don’t want to be late.
The two walk away from the shrine and cross into the busy crowd.
FEWNDY
You know, you didn’t have to follow me out here like this. You’re still injured, it would have been better if I had picked up the fish myself.
Lućeda leans forward and gibes with an irritated expression.
LUĆEDA
Aaann… Ťaerra ekaŕ’oju je je búakù’neia.
FEWNDY
Oh, but you’re just such a sweetheart, aren’t you?
LUĆEDA
Imdi, meiho.
Suddenly, all the villagers in the crowd halt to a stop.
RANDOM VILLAGE EXTRA
Ho cheese! It’s Leslie, the guy that works for the town official!
OTHER VILLAGE EXTRA
Leslie? Isn’t he the same guy that works for the town official that is casually and needlessly cruel to all of us villagers, and he gets away with it because of his high position?
THIRD VILLAGE EXTRA
The very same! And he’s coming this way, looking like he’s wantin’ to blow off some steam! Look alive folks! Don’t let him see your face!
LUĆEDA
Ee?
FEWNDY
Oh no, not this guy. Listen, you don’t want to do anything to get this guy upset. He’s a bit, err… Let’s say unhinged.
LUĆEDA
Búíæ?
Leslie passes by, carried in a palanquin. He crosses Lućeda and Fewndy. He takes note of Lućeda, who scowls at the bizarre looking man.
LESLIE
Wait! Stop!
Leslie looks down at Lućeda.
LESLIE
Hoo whee, looks like we got a real tang one on our hands over here boys!
LUĆEDA
Tang one?
The two stare each other down. Fewndy, sensing the mounting hostility, acts fast and pushes Lućeda’s head down so that her eyes don’t meet with Leslie’s.
FEWNDY
Jeez jeez jeez. I-I am so sorry sir! You’ll have to excuse her, she’s not from around here, she’s new, she’s not a villager, my dad found her injured near the riverbed and my family has been taking care of her ever sense and she says her name is Lućeda and I don’t know why she keeps acting this way, she’s weird. I’m so so sorry sir!
LESLIE
Shut up!
Fewndy yelps, startled by Leslie’s sudden outburst. Leslie leans in real close and he jabs Fewndy with a spindly finger.
LESLIE
Tell me, boy, what family are you from?
FEWNDY
M-M-M-M-Me? My family? I belong to the Dody residence. My name is Fewndy, by the way, and my mom and dad are-
LESLIE
You’re the ones that do the fences, right?
FEWNDY
Errr… Yes. My father pickets fences-… Sir.
Lućeda bites Fewndy’s hand causing him to scream and let her go. As this happens, Leslie goes on about himself.
LESLIE
What gives you the right, fence boy, tell me, what gives you the right to tell I, the great and inauspicious Leslie, who I shall and shant not forgive? You really think I’m going to let some lowly village rat as yourself exchange words with someone as mighty as I? I am the great ruler of this land, the promiscuous dignitary! The irreverent and unabashed leader of all you tiny, indigestive villagers!
FEWNDY
Ow ow ow!
LESLIE
And you’re what? Some lowly fence child and his weirdo female sidekick?
Released from Fewndy’s grasp, Lućeda points to herself.
LUĆEDA
Lućeda! Lućeda!
LESLIE
Yeah, I know.
Leslie examines her and he takes a note of the sword that rests by her hip.
LESLIE (V.O.)
A blade, huh? Must be some lone warrior dog, lost on her way. I’m sure no one would even care if I personally took care of her. Heck I may be doing a few people a favor! Wait a minute…
He takes a closer look at the sword and he notices a strange symbol on the hilt of the blade. It’s a crest, the Mæŕi family crest.
LESLIE (V.O.)
Cho mai gosh! I-It can not be!
FEWNDY
Uhhm, sir? I kind of don’t think you were using those words correctly when you were making that speech a moment ago?
Lućeda attempts to hide the crest on her blade when she notices Leslie staring at it.
LESLIE
A-Actually, you know what? I-I’m feeling generous today, so I’m letting you guys off with a warning. Yep, that’s what I’m going to do. Count yourselves lucky, if this were to ever happen again I wouldn’t even hesitate to end you both right on the spot.
Leslie hops in his palanquin and flees. Lućeda keeps a watchful eye as he does so.
FEWNDY
*sigh* That was lucky. I wonder what he was in such a hurry for?
Fewndy turns to Lućeda.
FEWNDY
What the heck is the matter with you Lućeda? Have you lost your freaking mind? First off, you don’t go around biting people. That really hurt! And besides, you know you can’t be disrespectful to superiors, like, ever. You must know at least that much. He could have killed us! You’re in peasant clothing right now and he was well within his rights.
Lućeda doesn’t face Fewndy at all as he’s making his speech, and keeps a careful view of Leslie.
FEWNDY
Uggghhh, we don’t have time for this! Come on we have to go.
Fewndy grabs Lućeda by the arm and drags her off, but she quickly yanks herself free.
LUĆEDA
Skim panti’oju búíæ? Fhíl ‘d qeás? Fhílai fhíl, ququmoñťhi meiho. Mahetta, meiho’püjfuní ñeñja meiho’qrróñe. Dettá’fhírrö.
Fewndy pauses for a moment.
FEWNDY
Errm… Ok then?
INT. FEWNDY’S HOME – DAY
As soon as Fenwdy and Lućeda return to the Dody household Fewndy is scolded by his mother DODY for being late.
DODY
Where the heck were you boy? We were all worried sick!
FEWNDY
Sorry mom. Me and Lućeda got a little held up by that man that works for the town official.
DODY
Uhm, Lućeda and I son. And you need to be more careful boy. Do you know what could have happened?
Dody takes out an old looking comic book and points to a page filled with strange sea sponges and a giant sea sponge with a single eye in the center.
DODY
I thought your brain was sponged over and you were mind controlled, like off of Stripe-o, the brain stealer! Obviously I can’t have you coming home with a brain sponge.
FEWNDY
Uhhm, ok mom.
Dody turns to Lućeda, who is still concentrating on the outside.
DODY
I’m so sorry Lućeda dear. You know you didn’t have to go out with the boy, you’re still healing. I hope it wasn’t too much trouble.
LUĆEDA
Pfüñjo ‘d oju. Dùùa.
DODY
We have you in these gross clothing, I’m so sorry. These are clothes for a commoner. You’re like Camumi Tomato from Gun Blaster, you deserve something befitting nobility!
LUĆEDA
Nilh, nilh. Dùùćipf dùùa.
DODY
Ok, I have no idea what she’s saying. Honey do you have the book that the boy picked up?
BUCDY
You mean the translation book?
Bucdy hands Dody the Fhùlujae to English dictionary and she flips through it.
DODY
What was it that you said dear?
LUĆEDA
D-Dùùa?
DODY
Let’s see here. I think she said… It was too much trouble.
Everyone turns to Fewndy.
FEWNDY
Wait, I didn’t-
DODY
What’s the matter with you boy!?
BUCDY
Yeah boy? What’s the matter with you boy?
DODY
Don’t you know what this girl is all about!? She’s like–… She’s like Sockskiis Kittyurine from Kill Locker Boyz. Did you watch that show son?
BUCDY
Did you even watch Kill La Lockers son?
DODY
Do you know what that show was about son? That was the show that saved animus son!
BUCDY
Do you not even care about the animus son?
FEWNDY
What?
DODY
Being disrespectful to Lućeda dear is being disrespectful to animu! I will not raise a son that is disrespectful to the savior of animu in my house, son! Now you get on out of here. Go– go, just get on out of here. I don’t even care what you do. Help your father with the fences, do that, I just don’t want to see you in this household anymore.
BUCDY
The nerve of this child.
DODY
The nerve of this child!
LUĆEDA
Noffbla ‘d oju. (My bad)
Fewndy is whisked away by his father to build more fences. Lućeda sneakily swipes the Fhùlujae to English dictionary from Bucdy as Fewndy is carried off. He gets one final last look in before he’s gone for good.
DODY
What’s that Lućeda dear? You want to help with dinner. Oh! That is far too kind of you. You’re like Kyokyou from Maison Icky sauce.
LUĆEDA
Dùùa.
EXT. SMALL VILLAGE – NIGHT
The moonlight looks over the land as a trio of beef boiz wander the street aimlessly. They’re inebriated, you can tell by the clumsy way they saunter through the streets.
DRUNK BEEF 1
So that’s when I said, ya can keep tickling it, but that ain’t no Stripe-o!
DRUNK BEEF 2
Ohh ho! Brother, you are absolutely a riot.
DRUNK BEEF 3
I still can’t believe you fit an entire snow globe in there.
DRUNK BEEF 1
Ey, it was my kid’s birthday. I had to get her somethin’.
The three drunken beefys come across a lone woman under a bright red parasol. She stands motionless under a dimming light near an adult magazine stand. One of the beefs scoff at her in disgust.
DRUNK BEEF 1
‘Ey girly. Wattaya’ doin’ out in the middle of the night, huh? Ya know that’s dangerous yeah?
The girl completely ignores the drunk-o.
DRUNK BEEF 1
Ey! Don’t ignore people when they’re out givin’ you perfectly good advice. You deaf or somethin’? I’m just tryin’ to help.
The drunk beef places a hand on the girl’s shoulder. In one seamless motion, she knocks out all three of the men.
Lućeda grunts, her injuries still fresh. She looks at one of the beef boize and tries to pick him up, but keels over in pain. She looks around, trying to figure out how she’s going to move the beef boys. She notices a stray wheelbarrow filled with chicken feed, right next to a chicken coop.
INT. TOOLSHED – NIGHT
Lućeda slaps the drunk beef, causing him to regain consciousness. He looks around, panicked to realize that he’s been tied up to a chair.
DRUNK BEEF 1
W-What are you doing? What do you want? I was just trying to give you some helpful advice!
Lućeda pulls out a strip of paper reading: WHERE IS HE that has an arrow pointing to a crudely drawn picture of Leslie. The drunk beef smiles, a nervous smile.
DRUNK BEEF 1
Look, I have no idea what you’re talkin’ about. You have to let me go, I’m just a guy that really likes giving midnight strangers helpful advice.
Lućeda goes to the back of the toolshed and pulls out some gardening clippers. She then calmly walks up to the drunk beef with the tool in hand.
DRUNK BEEF 1
W-Wait a minute. Wattaya’ plannin’ on doin’ with that?
Lućeda puts the pliers to the drunk beef’s finger. Sweat drips off the man’s wide forehead.
DRUNK BEEF 1
Y-You goin’ for some midnight hedge trimmin’? Y-You know I don’t think that’s how ya-
There’s a click, a snap, and then a scream, as we pan outside the toolshed. The other two beef boys and the wheelbarrow that Lućeda stole are visible.
EXT./INT. FEWNDY’S HOME – NIGHT
Lućeda walks outside of the toolshed, whistling dixie. She takes a few steps forward until she trips on something.
FEWNDY
Ow!
Fewndy gets off of the grass and starts rubbing his head.
FEWNDY
Hey! Watch where you’re going!
LUĆEDA
Meiho?
FEWNDY
Lućeda? Wait, what are you doing out here?
Lućeda backs away with a nervous glance, hiding the pliers behind her back.
FEWNDY
Eh, no matter.
He lays back down.
FEWNDY
It’s not like you can understand a word I’m saying anyways. Talking would be a waste of time, huh? Though it would be cool if we could communicate. There’s not much I know about you. I’d love to learn more.
LUĆEDA
?
There’s a brief silence.
FEWNDY
Oh, hey, wait a minute I have an idea.
Fewndy grabs Lućeda’s hand.
FEWNDY
Follow me!
LUĆEDA
D-Dótrro!
Fewndy races back into the house and brings Lućeda into his room. He rummages through his piles of junk.
FEWNDY
No, not it. Not it. I know it’s here somewhere. Give me a sec…
Fewndy’s room is filled with books, maps, and globes. Lućeda goes through some of Fewndy’s stuff as he searches.
LUĆEDA
Áa Meiho’oerrö pŕenota.
FEWNDY
Ah! Here it is!
Finally, Fewndy uncovers a huge book. He presents it to Lućeda.
FEWNDY
I can’t really explain this to you in words, so I thought I’d show you this.
Lućeda looks through the book, flipping past several pages. The book is filled with pictures from a bunch of seemingly random locales. She flips to a page that shows the entirety of the world, a large oroborus.
LUĆEDA
Ŕyze mystpe ‘oju… Chad’ťhirro! Lekía fhùlujae.
Lućeda points out the section written in her own language as Fewndy takes a seat.
FEWNDY
I’ve always loved collecting old books like this. Actually, I have the largest collection in the entire village! There’s just so much to collect and learn, I never run out of new things to study.
Fewndy leans his head back against a wall and reclines.
FEWNDY
I’m not like everyone else in the village. I’m not ok with being stuck here, toiling away with carpentry or whatever. That’s super gross. There’s a whole huge world out there and I want to see it all! I want to go exploring and go on adventures! I want to- I want to make a map!
Fewndy’s excitement begins to grow, and he starts speaking more frantically.
FEWNDY
I want to make a complete map of the entire planet. People have tried. Ever since cartography first began people have wanted to make a complete map of the entire world, but Chad is so dangerous and so massive that no one has ever been successful. I want to be the one that changes that. You know how big the world is Lućeda, so you of all people must understand how I feel!
As Fewndy gives his speech Lućeda rummages through all of his books and paraphernalia.
FEWNDY
But of course that’s easier said than done. I’ve lived my entire life here, and I don’t see things changing anytime soon. I don’t think I can make it out on my own. I’ve never shown this to anyone before. Most people in this village just won’t get it, and I’m fine with that. It’s part of the reason why I want to leave. I just want to see the world so badly, and you- you have to understand me, right? No, wait. Oh gosh, what am I doing? You were outside, doing your own thing and I dragged you into my room without thinking. I-Is this weird? Was this a weird creep thing to do? Oh no, I didn’t mean to be a creep! I just saw you out there, and I guess I got carried away. I mean, how could I not? I’ve never seen anything like you before! We don’t even speak the same language, you’re like living proof of how much is out there. Plus it doesn’t hurt that you’re actually kind of cute and why can I not stop talking?
As Fewndy drones on he nervously wrings his fingers together.
FEWNDY
Am I incapable of shutting up? You know, people say that I talk too much, but I don’t know. I mean, I don’t think I do this all the time, I don’t think this is an all the time thing, but maybe when I’m nervous? I talk the normal amount for people my age, at least I think I do. I don’t actually spend a lot of time with kids my age, everyone in this village seems fixated on learning the family trade, I think it’s dumb but whatever. C’est la vie or whatever. You are my age, right? We are both teenagers, aren’t we?
LUĆEDA
Üae! Seŕa meiho’imdi ñeñja!?
In frustration, Lućeda takes out the Fhùalujae to English dictionary and flips through it.
FEWNDY
Uhm, do you have something you want to-
LUĆEDA
Shut. Up.
There’s a beat.
FEWNDY
I was right about you being such a sweetheart, wasn’t I?
LUĆEDA
Vous avez une belle vie. Imdi ‘n be happy.
FEWNDY
Seriously, do you speak every language aside from English? And how can I be happy knowing how much is out there? I don’t want to die being an insignificant fence picketer!
LUĆEDA
Be. Happy. Yes.
FEWNDY
Oh geez, well put. Guess I can’t argue with that. You’ve opened my eyes, I guess I’ll go ahead, pack away all these dreams that I had. Such powerful wisdom, I should be happy while I stir in this lonely boring place until I die, what should I do with all these books?
LUĆEDA
Eat them.
FEWNDY
Wait what? Do you suddenly know English now?
Lućeda bites Fewndy.
FEWNDY
Ow! But why though?
LUĆEDA
Püjupüi.
Lućeda hands Fewndy the book and gets up.
FEWNDY
You bit me again! That really hurt!
LUĆEDA
Ćodo mátt, meiho.
FEWNDY
And what does that mean?
Lućeda points to Fewndy’s mattress then walks out. Fewndy sighs, defeated.
EXT./INT. LESLIE’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Lućeda stands outside Leslie’s home. She takes out a map scribbled in blood then scans the nearby area. Calmly, she walks towards the aristocrat’s home.
Leslie sleeps comfily in his bed, tucked away with his pajamas and his pet teddy bear. He looks as snug as a bug in a rug my thug.
LESLIE
No Maxwell, I don’t wanna take the medicine. They want me to take it the chicken way. Cold. Why do your hands gotta be so cold?
Suddenly there’s a smash, which startles Leslie awake.
LESLIE
What what what!?
He looks around, worried. He takes comfort when nothing immediately shows up.
LESLIE
I-It must have been my conjugation. That’s all. I think I’m going to be alright. I think I’m going to be al-
A shadowy figure leaps from behind the darkness and pounces on Leslie.
LESLIE
BWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIHEEHEEHEEHEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lućeda lurches over him, her hand brushing along the hilt of her blade. Leslie stares at her in abject fear.
LESLIE
Y-Y-Y-You!
LUĆEDA
Dùùa.
Lućeda is mere moments from taking the aristocrat’s life when suddenly the door swings open. A tall hunky man holding a tray of tea and biscuits walks in, stuffing his face.
VALE
Und Leslie you simply must try hien crump cake it’s simply divine.
As soon as the man enters everything halts to a stop. The room is momentarily still.
VALE
I’ll go get ze guard boys now.
LESLIE
No by all means take your time it’s only my entire freaking life at stake!
Lućeda screams and lunges at Vale, but Leslie grabs her by the leg. Vale makes a dash outside and quickly scrambles for a teleprompter.
VALE
Un you lazy guard boys get your fat hineys up. We’ve got a situation, our dear leader is under muy duress and we can really use some big strong muscley boys right about now!
All of the residents of the manor spring into action. They gather together and charge towards Leslie’s room.
Lućeda turns back to Leslie and growls at him. He shoots a cocky grin right back at her.
LESLIE
I knew it! You’re not some ordinary random wondering warrior, are you? No, you’re the ORACLE, the one that everyone’s been talkin’ about. You know, your face is plastered on a whole bunch of wanted posters. You’ve got a HUGE price on your head!
Lućeda screams and pounces toward Leslie, but before she finishes her move she’s surrounded. She scans the area and concludes that the best course of action is to flee. She jumps out the window, still injured, then reels over in pain. The guards close in on her. Lućeda makes a desperate bid to flee.
EXT./INT. DODY’S HOME – MORNING
Fewndy is still awake, lamenting his current face.
FEWNDY
Stupid mysterious waif, all telling me what to do, telling me to go to bed even though I wasn’t even tired. I’ll ćodo mátt when I want to ćodo mátt. This bed is cozy though.
Two loud cracks snap outside Fewndy’s window. He sits upright and he overhears his parents having a discussion. He peeks out of his bedroom to better overhear them.
BUCDY
What was that?
DODY
It’s some sort of crazy shoot out! Like off of a Terrantartartino movie! I’ve got to get out there.
BUCDY
Get out there to do what?
DODY
To see the shoot out of course! What else do you think?
BUCDY
That’s the kind of thinkin’ of someone who wants to get shot.
DODY
Oh shut up. Let’s see what’s going on! And grab the popcorn.
As Bucdy and Dody discuss, Fewndy sneakily grabs a bag and starts filling it up with his belongings.
EXT. SMALL VILLAGE – MORNING
While Lućeda is busy fleeing for her life a group of villagers gather around her. She’s cornered, surrounded by guards. Fewndy shows up as the guards circle her.
Seeing no other option, Lućeda relinquishes that she must fite. She pulls out her blade, only for it to be revealed that the blade has broken off and she only has a tiny sliver of sword left to defend herself with.
FEWNDY
That’s not good.
Lućeda’s attackers start to draw in on her. She takes a battle stance, but winces as the pain from her wounds are still fresh. Sweat beads down her forehead, and she bites down on her finger. Fewndy, deciding to take it on himself to help her out, scans the area to gain some kind of edge. He notices that there are stray chickens surrounding spilled chicken feed, and a confused farmer wondering what happened to his wheelbarrow.
The attackers inch ever closer to Lućeda, steadily, ready to pounce at a moment’s notice, but before they can…
FEWNDY
Hey! You ignominious reprobates! Get ready to taste defeat!
BEEF BOI 1
Nyeh?
BEEF BOI 2
Hey, where’d this crazy kid come from?
BEEF BOI 3
Actually, I hadn’t had breakfast yet so yeah, I could go for somethin’ to eat.
Everyone turns to Fewndy, who holds armfuls of chicken feed. With a deft toss he dumps all of it onto the beef boix.
BEEF BOI 1
Ha! How are you going to beat us with this stuff, idiot?
BEEF BOI 3
Defeat tastes like cornmeal.
A whole bunch of chickens swarm all of the beefs.
BEEF BOI 1
What the heck is this!?
BEEF BOI 2
It’s chickens! He threw chickens at us!
As the beefy boizs are rendered helpless by the might of the chickens, Fewndy snatches up Lućeda and makes a break for it.
Next chapter—> Oracle of the Mæŕi Chapter 2: This Bear was Framed
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